Harrington Turns Brains To Nursery Rhymes. Question’s King

Padraig Harrington, the most cerebral (that’s brainy to you and me) golfer on the planet is taking a break from golf at the moment and for t...

Padraig Harrington, the most cerebral (that’s brainy to you and me) golfer on the planet is taking a break from golf at the moment and for the first time ever is focussing his immense intelligence on matters other than his swing. Pog-Rig as he is affectionately known in the US attended the Gift Grub Live Show in Dublin last night but spent the entire performance reading a book of children’s nursery rhymes and frantically scribbling notes.

Golf critics, who filled the entire row behind him, later questioned Harrington’s concentration and shorthand game.  The three time Major Champion told the assembled press, “Aaaaaaa I lost my focus during the show. I had no Crunchy Granolas.  Instead my attention was drawn to some glaring inaccuracies in these nursery rhymes my kids read.”

“Take for instance Humpty Dumpty.  Obviously I’m not delighted that he fell off the wall but am concerned that they sent all the King’s horses and all the King’s men to try and reassemble him.  What would have happened if another country invaded at that very moment?  Would the Queen have had to tell the invaders ‘sorry the King, all of his men, and every horse we have are not available to fight today as they’re trying to glue a broken egg’.  Anyway why would you send a horse to fix an egg?  Surely hooved equines would never have the brain power or dexterity to complete such a delicate operation?”

Pic: Harrington and friend Sergio Garcia  took time out earlier this year to visit Humpty Dumpty during his recuperation.  The blue scrubs are an indication of just how delicate Mr. Dumpty’s condition remains.

Harrington went on to question Jack and Jill’s complete lack of preparedness when fetching their pale of water.  “Did they not even consider Health and Safety for even one minute?” he asked before adding  “Notwithstanding the fact that I’ve never even heard of people climbing a hill to fetch water, it was obvious that both Jack and Jill attempted the technically challenging ascent totally unprepared, without the correct footwear, headwear or any form of communication device.  As soon as Jack fell and broke his crown, Jill should have secured her position on the hill then radioed mountain rescue services seeking help. From the rhyme it’s clear she took matters into her own hands in attempting a daring rescue and suffered the consequences by tumbling after.”

It’s thought that during the Christmas break Harrington will also turn his gray matter to solving Fermat’s last theorem, figuring out the mystery of how they get the figs into the fig rolls and why socks disappear in the laundry.

COMMENTS

BLOGGER: 1
  1. Brainy PodRig would however, in all probability know that Jack and Jill went to fetch the water not lacking in colour (i.e. pale) but carrying a small bucket (pail). CousN.!!

    ReplyDelete

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GolfCentralDaily | Golf Parody Fun Gossip Jokes Betting Tips: Harrington Turns Brains To Nursery Rhymes. Question’s King
Harrington Turns Brains To Nursery Rhymes. Question’s King
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