So Lee Westwood posted this picture of the European Team in jeans. Here’s what we can read into it.
1. Times are tough in Europe. We could only afford a few pairs of slacks.
2. Sergio’s jeans are worn more at the knees. He’s been praying.
3. Jose Maria shaved exactly 2 hours ago. We can tell this by analysing the 4.7mm of stubble that has grown back since he shaved.
4. Paul McGinley had his shoes and socks stolen by Miguel Angel Jimenez, who is grinning behind him.
5. Jimenez’ favourite film is Saturday Night Fever. Check out those collars.
6. Europe may well have swapped Lee Westwood for Charl Schwartzel. Could have sworn that’s the South African at the back.
7. Nico Colsaerts and Darren Clarke couldn’t give two hoots for photographer’s direction. They’re two men you wouldn’t want in your wall in a soccer match.
8. Justin Rose didn’t make it to the fitting day. He got XXXL.
9. Nobody is gonna mess with Tommy Bjorn. He’s seen Taken 15 times and has “a particular set of skills”.