Fears that the young boy who stole Martin Kaymer's golf ball at the Tour Championship would have his arm chopped off were allayed this morning after authorities in Dubai issued a statement on the matter.

"We don't chop arms off any more here for stealing," said chief of Dubai Police Chief Bin Al-Phlegmtar.  "That's just ridiculous.  We got rid of that law about two years ago.  The boy will instead serve three years in prison, suspended by his ankles. Now be gone infidel."

Here's the incident.


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