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Mickelson's blade working at Pebble. But not one shot shown live

Phil Mickelson is back! Well sort of.

Lefty shot the lights out in the second round of the 2016 Pebble Beach Pro Am but the TV coverage missed most of it.

Luckily the highlights package got some of it for posterity.

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Protracer: Are these ladies responsible for all the lines?

Protracer eh?

Formerly a word used to describe someone high skilled in the art of placing greaseproof paper over a drawing and copying it but now recognised by all as that cool liney thing that shows the trajectory of the golf ball.

But it is real?

Protracer: Dont leave your credit card near it.

Protracer uses an imaging camera mounted on a tripod beside the main camera behind a tee box.

Protracer uses a custom built CMOS (complementary metal-oxide semiconductor) that has the ability to detect the ball for the full duration of its flight using our proprietary software. Graphics are then added to make the shot trajectory visible on TV. The power of Protracer lies in the fact that TV producer’s can use it live, meaning you will experience the shot exactly as the player does. The viewer can follow the ball shaping toward its final destination, in the middle of the fairway, next to the pin or, occasionally, in the neighboring state.

Or is it just drawn by little old ladies in an office out the back?

Whatever it is, it's pretty damn cool!

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Love. Wives bad for Tour.
Virginia Water: At a small reception at Euro Tour headquarters this morning chief press executive Ed Napelley presented a special Waterford Crystal bowl to Stefan Gruber, the 1000th player to get a divorce since the inception of the Tour in 1972.

"I'm delighted that we've reached the Divorce milestone and honoured that Stefan is the 1000th man to get his marching orders," said Napelley.  "I've seen him in action in the short time I've been here and the horny bastard would get up on a crack on a plate.  He is a truly amazing cheating skilled person and deserves a divorce.  Now he can play a lot more golf out here on Tour and bang anything that moves guilt free."
On Tour late at night a player has needs. And all players needs MUST be met.
Napelley went on to explain the Tour's bizarre stance as regards welcoming divorce.

"You've heard the phrase 'Too many dicks on the dancefloor' right?" he explained.
"For ease of explanation let's call our European Tour players dicks and our caddies pussies okay? Well our Tour dancefloor is full of dicks, and we all know dicks are absolutely useless without pussies. And out here our dicks need pussies constantly.  Sometimes the dicks swap around the pussies,  but that's okay. As long as they keep playing our Tour. 
 But what we certainly cannot have is nagging wives getting in the way of our dicks and pussies.  Yes wives are going to be jealous when their dicks spend five weeks away from home with some other pussies. Other wives want to bring their dicks to play in America.  And when a wife gets in the way of our dicks and pussies doing what they love to do out here on Tour, it means less revenue for us.  Let's call us arseholes
Dicks don't like us arseholes. Wives hate arseholes. Pussies and arseholes operate alongside each other but serve a completely separate function.  But on a Tour like ours, which is full of dicks, it's us arseholes who those dicks turn to when they have wife problems.  We hate doing it, but we arseholes serve a vital purpose on Tour.  And our lives, and the lives of the dicks and pussies out here would be a damn site less complicated without wives. 
More as it emerges.

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Big news from the BBC this morning. Tiger Woods is to be part of the new Top Gear line up.  Woods was unveiled as a co-host alongside Chris Evans, The Stig, Joey from Friends, the wig guy from Formula 1 and some other people.

GCD sources deep within the BBC have suggested that Woods will part of the "Star In A Reasonably Priced Mobility Scooter" where each week top celebrities will attempt to complete against Woods in a lap around a race track on a disused air base without the battery going flat.

More as it emerges.

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Haydn Porteous. Defying three bans at least right here!
In case you missed this at the Tshwane Open yesterday, this was Hayden Porteous defying shirts, shorts and all sorts of European Tour bans.

Haydn Porteous recreates the Stenson Strip!
Posted by Donal Hughes on Thursday, February 11, 2016

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Caddies continue to get it tough on both main Tours.

While golf gets richer they continue to get shafted.

Tim Finchem: Farts perfume.

Yesterday former looper Michael Collins highlighted the class differential on Tour when health care was brought up.  You would think that having healthy caddies would be in the interest of the PGA Tour.

195 caddies asked for less than FOUR THOUSANDTH OF 1 PERCENT (0.004%) to start health care and retirement benefits, and the PGA Tour said no. In 2014, the PGA Tour reported revenue of $1.129 BILLION dollars, Commissioner Tim Finchem was paid $11.2 million dollars. 
Collins pointed to an article on SportsBusinessDaily which detailed PGA Tour boss Tim Finchem's outrageous pay packet.

PGA Tour Commissioner Tim Finchem earned $11.2 million in 2014, more than double the $4.8 million he made in 2013, largely because of a payout tied to a tour incentive plan, according to the tour’s newly available 2014 tax return.
As that wasn't enough of a kick in the teeth, a judge ruled  that caddies should have no say, nor should profit from the bibs they wear.

Caddies lost their class-action lawsuit against the PGA Tour when a federal judge in California ruled they signed a contract with the tour that requires them to wear bibs as part of their uniform and cannot claim that corporate sponsorship on the bibs makes them "human billboards."
U.S. District Judge Vince Chhabria dismissed the lawsuit Tuesday night with prejudice, which typically means it cannot be refiled.
The caddies intend to appeal the ruling.
"We are obviously disappointed with the Court's ruling," Gene Egdorf, the lawyer who has been representing the caddies, told ESPN's Michael Collins via email. "With all due respect to the Court, we feel he got it wrong."

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