swampass guide_thumb[4] News is just emerging of a group of European and PGA Tour players seemingly furious over the R&A and USGA’s continuing decision to leave the “Swampass” epidemic unchecked in the latest revision of the rules of golf.

The anonymous group of Touring Pros calls itself “SOS” or Stamp out Swampass, consists of players who at one point had to stand alongside or play with swampass suffers during the year and were traumatized, not to mention physically ill, after the experience.

One member of SOS said “Take Garrigus for example, he hits it a long way, but at what price?  He literally craps himself a little attempting to hammer every tee shot.  Golf courses all the US are having to beef up their drainage systems and one course reported record grass growth on a patch of fairway where Garrigus sat during a delay at this year’s St. Jude Classic.”  Another said “He held his hand out after the round.  I was afraid to shake it. Next time I’m gonna bring some loo roll for him in my bag!” Tiger Woods is also listed as a Level 1 Swampass sufferer.

SOS are advocating the use of diapers, talcing tents alongside the first tee where players must “drop and powder up” and are campaigning heavily to the R&A and USGA for a rule change forbidding the wearing of white or pink golf trousers in warm weather.

A statement from Garrigus and Woods, joint Chairmen of the Association of Swampass Sufferers (ASS) is due out later today.

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Donal Hughes

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