Pro Tracer Video: Tiger Woods Unveils New Poolside Mega Draw Shot at 2012 Arnold Palmer Invitational
With just under two weeks to Augusta Tiger Woods demonstrated his new Poolside Draw Shot at the 2012 Arnold Palmer Invitational.
With just under two weeks to Augusta Tiger Woods demonstrated his new Poolside Draw Shot at the 2012 Arnold Palmer Invitational.
Child psychologists are this evening probing a revolutionary new treatment in alleviating childhood crying fits pioneered by golfing legend Arnold Palmer. The octogenarian performed the technique on Annika Sorenstam’s whinging baby son William live on US television today leaving viewers stunned and intrigued.
One year old William was appearing with his parents on the broadcast to publicly thank Palmer for saving him as an infant from Angelina Jolie, who was trying to adopt him and add to her collection of 17 children.
“Everything went really well in rehearsals” said Golf Channel producer Todd Backstop “but we never took into account the sinister effect Johnny Miller has on small children. He scares the living crap out of them.”
The television audience were left open mouthed seconds later as magical Grandad Palmer turned little William’s crocodile tears into smiles by waggling his wrists and presenting the baby with an exemption into his tournament in 20 years time. “That’s the best present ever” Sorenstam said after “ William can now look forward to a potential $40 million payday if he wins the event, taking into account inflation and Bloomberg’s 20 year forecast on the strength of the dollar in 2032. It’s really great having that peace of mind that our baby’s welfare is secured. He starts practicing in five years and four months time”.
Palmer is now due to appear alongside “you know it’s wrong but you definitely would anyway” Jo Frost in the next episode of Supernanny. The pair are set to go head to head with rabid six year old twins who can turn their heads 360 degrees and speak fluent Latin without ever having been taught it. It’s rumoured that Palmer will attempt to exorcize the children’s demons by offering the pair a club and clothing contract and three PGA Tour exemptions in 2025.
2012 Arnold Palmer Invitational Second Round Highlights from the PGA Tour.
Admitting that he regularly makes himself into a large toasted sandwich and attempts to eat himself, Bubba Watson broke down in tears yesterday on US TV. Speaking on The Golf Channel’s Morning Drive show, the mop haired star fought back tears as he described how he constantly feels hungry.
Watson told presenters “While the rest of the guys were in the gym pumping iron this morning, I had a second bowl of muesli then two of those tiny cheese things with the waxy red cover.” He then went on to publicly chastise himself for experiencing hunger, a natural phenomenon governed by complex neural brain processes and designed to ensure the human body receives the fuel it needs to produce ATP (Adenosine TriPhosphate), the energy units essential to maintain the body’s metabolic processes and sustain life.
“I have let myself, my fellow professionals and The PGA Tour down”, Watson said in relation to his inability to play one round of golf without eating a Crunchy Granola bar and a banana. “My damn brain is writing cheques my body cant cash. We are so spoiled out here on Tour, things like energy bars and fruit are freely available. It’s a rock and roll world and I have to rise above it”.
Watson was later seen behind the studio shoving his arm into a large baguette.
Bay Hill:- According to eye witnesses, up to three press writers wearing slippers and hearing aids burst into an Arnold Palmer press conference wheeling in what appeared to be a Loaded Question. One of the men placed wooden wedges in front of the Question to anchor it, a second then loaded the Question with 100 pounds “SNUB”, then stood aside while a third man lit a long fuse.
Thankfully the reeling Hall of Famer only suffered super-financial wounds and, dismissing officials who were attempting to clean off the SNUB, issued the following statement.
"I'm disappointed that they are not here, no question about it. I'm certainly not happy that those fellas chose not to come this year. We are doing everything we can to entice them to come and play."
Wiping a large clump of SNUB from his face Palmer then issued this warning to his three would-be attackers.
“I had a letter from Rory seeking my consultation and told me he wasn't coming. And of course that made me feel great. And if you believe that, I'll talk to you outside afterwards.”
More as it emerges.
Congrats to Tom Kennedy on his new role in Mount Juliet. The new boy has got straight down to work at the former Irish Open and two time host to the WGC by launching what might be the biggest gamble ever undertaken by an Irish golf course.
Basically Mount Juliet are offering everyone who plays the course their money back if Rory McIlroy wins The Masters. With Rors quoted at just 4/1 with Paddypower this seems like an offer that just cannot be refused. Full details are here http://www.mountjuliet.ie/MajorsOpenSeries/
Or you can call (056) 777 3000 to find out more.
Japanese golfer Ryo Ishikawa famous for having his face on his golf ball and managing to somehow get invites to all the big tournaments has revealed he his dying to show off the new mark he plans to put on his ball.
Speaking from Augusta after receiving an invite for the 2012 Masters, Ishikawa told Japanese TV, “This is going to be the coolest mark anyone has ever put on a ball. It’s so easy anyone could do it and trust me when you see it you’ll be putting it on your ball. I’m dying to show it to everyone at this year’s Summer’s British Open. But only if I get an invite, that is.”
Ishikawa’s management team last night quelled rumours that the young Japanese is actually using this as a clever trick to fool the R&A in getting an invite to The Open because he hasn’t a hope in hell of qualifying by rights. “No honestly, I swear, you have to see the ball mark, it’s just sooooo cool” his manager said. “Cross my heart and hope to die and swear on my two kids lives. Just give us an invite and you will see it. You wont be disappointed”.
R&A boss Peter Dawson who marks his own ball with a cool hexagon using five sharpies is said to giving the request serious consideration.
Okay I’m not in the mood for it anymore so I’m going to be blunt. Tiger Woods Achilles is just fine. He was having so much fun yesterday at The Tavistock Cup that he clean forgot to do some limping or wincing.
So by my mathematics two rounds at Lake Nona plus four rounds at Bay Hill equals six rounds in seven days with a Major just days after. Now unless you’re more naive than a Belieber, you’ll know that’s not the schedule of an injured golfer or one that’s nursing anything more than a bruised ego after missing a few putts and walking off the course. All that was missing there was Woods running off with the flag shouting “It’s my flag and I don’t wanna play with ye anymore.”
For the record Woods shot a 66 and was having long driving contests with Bubba Watson, and for the record he’ll probably be 66 before his Achilles really starts to bother him.
More shocking revelations from Hank Haney's new book The Big Miss have emerged today. This time they involve the small devoutly Catholic country of Ireland, Tiger Woods and 24 hours of high quality pornography.
Haney recounted the incident on the eve of the 2006 Ryder Cup when Tiger Woods and Zach Johnson roomed at the Kildare venue and where his drives weren’t the only thing being tugged by the multiple Major Champion that week.
An excerpt from Haney's book reads, ' Tiger, when he got to the suite first, immediately purchased the adult movie 24-hour package and turned the television on. When Zach walked in, he saw the sights and sounds but didn't change the channel or turn it off. Tiger never commented on the movies, nor did Zach."
It is believed both men missed practice and a team meeting that day, preferring to remain in the darkened room, sitting transfixed either side of the sofa and only occasionally moving to order Kleenex Mansize Tissues from room service.
The spokesperson with responsibility for Team USA's porn that week, Thomas Tank, recalled the incident. "Back in 2006 good quality porn was difficult to find. There were many cases where the trailers looked very good with oiled up babes who really seemed to be having fun but when you started watching the scenes went on far too long and they all had fake boobs and extreme landing strips. The stuff we got in Ireland was about 20 years old, it was some terrific wholesome old school porn.
As Haney recalled the incident between Johnson and Woods had a happy ending. Woods told Haney about the conclusion saying 'I got him pretty good.'
The PGA Tour was rocked to its foundations yesterday after it emerged that eight cases of racist abuse were confirmed at last weeks Transitions Championship. The offences were all directed at Jim Furyk’s extremely white head.
Furyk’s head was exposed momentarily as he removed his cap to shake hands with fellow competitors after he completed his final round at Innisbrook sparking a deluge of racist slurs from nearby spectators.
Most of the chants were so shocking as to unrepeatable. Others included “Chalk The Cue Ball, Chalk Chalk the Cue Ball” “Who Switched on The 5 Hour Bulb?” and “We want Fester’s sunblock, We want Fester’s sunblock, na na na na, na na na na. What is it? Factor A Zillion?”
PGA Tour boss Tim Finchem said today "We’re all shocked at these eight cases of racism levelled at Jim Furyk. I can understand one, or maybe two racially sensitive comments based on the fact that Jim’s head looks like an untanned tit after a week in Barbados, but eight is unacceptable.
Finchem went to describe as “worrying” a report that two African American golf fans “ran in the completely opposite direction” when Furyk approached to sign autographs.
"We can only hope that we don’t encounter more prejudice based on the colour of a man’s skin this week at the Arnold Palmer invitational” Finchem said. “I think if we could keep the number down to three quality incidents of racism it will be a huge success”.
More as it emerges.
Thursday Mar 22 – Sunday Mar 25, 2012
Bay Hill Club & Lodge · Orlando, Florida
odds on exchanges
Found out a little in his short putting last week and then faced “that interview” with Steve Sands after. If Els is to have any chance of keeping up his record of appearing in every Masters since 1993, he needs to perform this week. Bay Hill is a course where experience counts. Els has won here when the course was a par 70 and again when it reverted back to a 72 in 2010. Good in the wind, we know he’s in good form so what’s not to like?
A welcome return to form last week getting into the playoff at The Transitions. Shotlink placed Furyk fourth in greens in regulation, a stat which will be even more critical this week. Tied 11th in 2010 and tied ninth last year. If Furyk can do better than his opening round 74 of 12 months ago, he can contend again this week.
Of the European contingent I think Sergio Garcia has a decent shout this week. Bay Hill is all about shotmaking with it’s four par 3’s ranking collectively as the toughest on Tour and Garcia is haute couture when it comes to designing shots. Tied 16th last week just five shots off the pace but better than that, only took four bogeys all week ranking fifth in greens in regulation. The greens at Bay Hill are super tough, even the best struggle to make birdies, and this plays into the Spaniard’s hands. This will be his 11th event at the venue and been in the top 10 six times, including last year.
Recent winner at the WGC Cadillac and sure to be in the mix again this week. Word from inside the ropes is that everyone is marveling at Rose’s ball striking right now. Don’t be fooled either at his tied 29th last week, according to shotlink Rose actually tied for first in greens hit in regulation, something that will pay more dividends this week. Rose won twice within a month in 2010, so don’t rule it out.
I feel a bit guilty for tipping Webb Simpson 22/1 last week so I’m going to make it up by going with him one more time at Bay Hill. He may not have cashed in at Copperhead but again but in a good performance with a tied 10th finish. Shot all four rounds in the 60’s and certainly is one to keep an eye on over the coming weeks. Kevin Na at 90/1 may not be a form dog coming into this week but he is a horse for course and those odds are too generous for a guy who tied 2nd as recently as 2010.
· Tough. Ranked 2nd hardest par 72 last year outside of the Majors.
· Average winning score over the last four years: 9 under
· Changed from par 70 to par 72 in 2010
· 7,419 yards
· Key stat: Greens in regulation.
· Expected Weather: Light winds
Steve Sands should have. And while I dont agree with the calls to sack him over it, I do think Sands should have come up with questions a little more articulate than “Did you have the confidence to make that putt?” Here is the interview as posted on the deadspin website. I’m guessing the PGA Tour wont be posting it on theirs!
Luke Donald proved to Rory McIlroy he wont be pushover when it comes to being World Number One by winning the 2012 Transitions Championship. Donald sealed the win after birdieing the first playoff hole at Innisbrook. Here are the final round highlights.
Former winners Jim Furyk and Retief Goosen Lead heading into the final round of the 2012 Transitions Championship. Here are the highlights from round three.
It’s with great sadness I sit here and write my thoughts on the passing of my friend, Connor Mallon. We had to go as far as America to meet up and have the craic, but spoke on the phone regularly and took the mick out of each other on facebook the rest of the time. I bet Connor had a lot of friends. Every one with a story.
We spoke on the phone just two weeks ago about doing a series of pro tips on how to play links courses. Connor could play links courses. He could play any course. “Be great for the yanks!”, he said.
We were to film at his course Narin and Portnoo in April but on Connor’s insistence we were going to hop in the car and travel to Ballyliffin and then to Rossapenna and then a few others “just to give everyone in the NorthWest a bit of coverage”. Make a trip out of it, meet everyone, do it right. That’s the kind man he was.
Everyone will have their stories about Connor. He was the friendliest, most animated character you could ever meet. People gravitated towards him. I’ve played in big sporting events in my life and met famous people yet cant remember the details of any of them. I can remember every minute I spent in Connor Mallon’s company.
Pic: Trying on “the wearable condom” on the Cross clothing stand for a laugh!
The last time we met up was in Orlando for the PGA Show in January. A bunch of us went downtown to see the Orlando Magic play the visiting Boston Celtics in an NBA game. Mick Walsh and myself had tickets up in the rafters and one for Connor. He gave his ticket to someone who was stuck. Typical! “I’ll follow yez in lads!” Ten minutes into the game, he makes his way up to the seats, takes one look at how bloody high up they are and says “who wants food?”
We didn’t see Connor again until after the game in a pub across the road. He arrived in with Justin Farrell and a big smile on his face brandishing a picture on his phone. “Where the f*ck were you boss?” we said.
“Take a look at this boys” he boomed swinging his phone so we could see the image. The picture showed Connor, on the court at The Amway arena, his arm around a Boston Celtics player like he knew him all his life! Now I know what you’re thinking; how did he manage to get past mega security, sit in $2000 courtside seats and walk onto the court of an NBA game and convince Kevin Garnett to pose for a picture?
That night we sung songs. Mick and Doc from Mayo, Johnny Farren and Connor from Donegal. Sang them in the pub, sang them on the street, sang them in the club, even sang them in the taxi. Connor and his three backing vocalists in the back drove that Indian taxi lad mad with Whiskey and Rye, but by Jesus he paid him well for his trouble.
Pic: Two boys with the gift of the gab!
Connor Mallon. A father, a husband, a golfer, a friend…….and a Character. I bet Connor had a lot of friends. Every one with a story. RIP.
It’s all right folks. Just days after Tiger’s OJ Simpsonesque slow car chase out of Doral, the Wooden One has resurfaced on American TV. There may be have been weeping and gnashing of teeth among the Tiger fans last week but as it turns out Woods Achilles Heel isn’t actually his Achilles Heel.
On Good Morning America he told the presenter Robin Roberts "I'll be there. Don't worry about it. I took a few days off. I'll start hitting balls tomorrow. The stiffness is gone. Hopefully, I'll be ready next week."
They then played a hole on Tiger Woods PGA Tour 13. After Woods took four on a par—3, Roberts was left a tap in for par saying “All I need is to make this to once again beat Tiger Woods”. And she did! Here’s the video.
After tipping Charl Schwartzel into a place at 34/1, I chat with Dave and Joe about our tips for the 2012 Transitions and a long odds shot for Andalucia as we share a jacuzzi filled with 50 euro notes.
Tips start at 30 mins 30 seconds.
Padraig Harrington is back! The Pod Rig shot a record 61 in the first round of the 2012 Transitions Championship. Here are the highlights from the first round.
Rory McIlroy might not be swinging a club in competition again until The Masters but he’s busy busy busy ironing his tuxedo before a trip to the White House for a meeting with Barack Obama. I know what you are thinking. St Patrick’s Day is coming and Rory has been drafted in for the annual back slapping fest complete with over-the-top bowl of shamrock.
But no! Rors is actually heading there tonight as part of a blacktie event to honour British PM David Cameron. McIlroy will be joined by other famous British figures, sportsmen and actors for the formal State dinner.
In a statement released by Irish Premier Enda Kenny last night he said “Damn, I should have thought of that. When is St. Patrick’s Day again?”
After tonight's dinner McIlroy heads back to his home in Jupiter Florida where he will practice at The Bear’s Club in the lead up to the Masters. I have it on good authority though that Rors will raise a pint to St. Patrick on Saturday night.
Here’s a great video from golfing world of the top 10 golfing tantrums.
I was chatting to Lynn McCool from Lough Erne last week and she told me about their Friends Of Lough Erne fourball offer. You’ll get tea/coffee and a bacon butty before you go out, all for €50, based on a fourball. To book call the office on 028 66345766 or if calling from the Republic 048 66345766 and say you heard about it on golfcentraldaily. The offer ends at the end of April.
Standing on the par three15th tee Paul Casey agreed with caddie Craig Connelly if he got a hole in one he would split the prize, a Cadillac parked feet away, with him. They even shook hands to rubber stamp the bet.
After Casey’s ball went in tot he hole Connelly started laughing manically, practically climbing up on his boss with happiness.
As they walked off the tee, Casey asked a Marshall about the prize and was told the car was actually the prize on the 13th hole and not the 15th. Connelly’s face goes from sheer joy to utter dejection while Casey gets the last laugh. Here’s the video.
Quick thinking TaylorMade designers have managed to come up a new number cap to commemorate Sergio Garcia’s back nine in the first round of the WGC Cadillac Championship. It’s believed Sergio will wear the cap for the rest of the season.
High ranking cardinals from Rome have been dispatched by private jet to Florida today to investigate claims of a Jesus sighting during the WGC Cadillac Championship at Doral.
According to Papal envoy Cardinal Francesco Totti “All claims of seeing the Son of God must be investigated thoroughly. Especially with the strength of the euro currency against the dollar and the abundance of strip clubs in the greater Miami area. Pope Benedict needs 400 Marlboro Lights too, not the long ones, so it all ties in nicely”.
The sighting in question was reported by a cameraman operating from a crane high above the Blue Monster Course where the tournament is being played. Al “Jumbo” Trontowsky, 48, recounted the events leading up to his seeing the young Nazarene carpenter and one third of the Holy Trinity; “I had the camera trained on Dustin Johnson’s caddie kneading something in his pocket because that’s what the network likes me to do, when I got a message in my ear from the producer telling me to film Johnson’s drive. After the ball was hit it was obvious it was headed straight for me. I felt a cold chill and saw my life flash before my eyes, then a bearded man, about 32 years old with an unkempt brown beard, with kind eyes and outstretched arms beckoning me towards him. Then I blacked out.”
Vatican officials are expected to interview Trontowsky later today. “I’m looking forward to chatting to Mr Jumbo” said Cardinal Totti adding “this could solve everything. Jesus disappeared a mere one thousand nine hundred and eighty odd years ago, still a young man, albeit with minor injuries. We’ve always maintained he is out there somewhere and this could just be the lead we are after to gain the Catholic Church some respectability.”
In a completely unrelated incident former US Open Champion Lucas Glover was arrested near the course yesterday after he tried to scale a security fence and gain entry to the property. Glover dressed in a white robe and sandals, yelled Psalms as he was lead away.
Here’s designer Gil Hanse’s design for golf’s Olympic comeback in Rio 2016. The course design is layered onto a google maps type aerial photo on the site.
Top European Tour referee John Paramor took swift and decisive action last night, after walking his dogs and watching Barcelona, to strip Rory McIlroy of the point he won against Maria Sharapova. The controversial point was played out at the BNP Paribas International Showdown event at Madison Square Gardens on Monday night.
A vodka fuelled viewer from Sharapova’s home country of Russia emailed the European Tour after viewing the video on youtube, claiming that McIlroy’s first serve did not land inside the service line according to the International Tennis Federation rules, the world governing body on the game. Yevgany Bollockov, 46, pointed out that notwithstanding a clear foot fault, McIlroy’s underarm serve that landed near the baseline appeared to go unnoticed by respected Chair Umpire Carlos Bernardes.
Paramor has been quick to respond, stripping McIlory of the point two days later and ordering that it be replayed as a “second serve”. Furthermore Paramor issued a public warning to the Ulsterman for time wasting and not being attired according to Section 7-3 of the ITF code.
It is thought McIlroy will return to New York tonight after the first round of the WGC Cadillac Championship being staged in Florida to replay the point against Sharapova behind closed doors.
Ger Gilroy and Dave McIntyre grill me on my failure to make them a bucket of money last week from my tips and we talk about betting at the 2012 WGC Cadillac Championship at Doral. Also on the podcast is Karl McGinty on Rory McIlroy and Gary Murphy’s tips and a profile of Killeen Castle. My Tips start at 25 minutes in.
Smith, nicknamed The Joplin Ghost turned pro at 18 and was the first man to win The Masters at Augusta in 1934. He won it again in 1936.
Smith’s wins before age 23
Bubba Watson: Ping G20. The 8.5-degree club has, "Made Exclusively for Bubba," written on the crown. It measures 44.5 inches and includes a pink True Temper Grafalloy Bi-Matrix shaft and Ping 703 Gold grips.
Kyle Stanley: Titleist 910D3 (8.5°) with a Mitsubishi Diamana Kali 70X shaft.
Alvaro Quiros: Callaway RAZR Fit 9.5 (actually 8.3), Grafalloy Blue Shaft X flex. 45.5"
Nicolas Colsaerts: Driver Callaway RAZR Fit 9.5° - Shaft Fujikura Motore Speeder VC 8.1 - X Flex