Just when the Americans are getting good again, poor old Tommy Bjorn is to be the next European Ryder Cup Captain.  The Dane beat off Paul Lawrie for the 2018 position, described by many as "about as popular as the England football manager job."

In the now traditional ceremony Bjorn gets thrown to the floor very roughly as his credentials for Ryder Cup Captaincy are tested by the European Tour boss.

The decision came down to a 'throwing to the floor very roughly' contest, with Bjorn edging out Lawrie who has a bad knee.

European Tour chief Keith Peeley said "Thomas is a very talented golf skilled person, and we look forward to blaming him as the reason for losing in Paris 2018.  We're excited to see if he fucks up the Captain's picks like the last guy.  

The 45-year old Dane was a long time chairman of the European Tour Argument Committee where he was known affectionately as "industrial toilet roll" because he's rough tough and takes no shit.

Former Ryder Cup Captain Ian Woosnam was the first to congratulate Bjorn on twitter, saying


More as it emerges.

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