An Irish chiropractor has claimed today that he could fix Rory McIlroy's injury problems "with one almighty crack" of his back and has asked the Northern Irishman to give him a call.

Dr Paul O'Farrelly, not a real doctor, who runs his own chiropractic clinic, not a real clinic, in County Mayo believes some of the world's top sports physicians may have misdiagnosed McIlroy.

"Look at this model of a vertebral column I'm twisting the crap out of here and you can see the ribs are clearly connected to the back by bonification lobes," said O'Farrelly. "If I got Rory on his side on my table, one knee bent up to arse and one hand on the opposite shoulder, and got a good grip, I'd make him into a new man in two seconds.  I just say 'small breath in and big breath out' or some shite like that to distract him and then jump down on top of him like a Hulk Hogan until I hear that big mutherfuckin' satisfying crack of bone on bone and he'll be right as rain.  And if he's not right as rain, I'll tell him he'll be right as rain tomorrow."

"I'm telling ye the whole would only take my 30 seconds and I'd only want €60 cash."

O'Farrelly, who has a certificate on the wall from some university in America, not a real university, says he could fit McIlroy in near the end of November at 6am in the morning.

More as it emerges.

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Chiro Inspired by a headline in Waterford Whispers News.
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